Here it is the annual Mr and Mrs photo from Alexander's Charity Ball !!!

What an absolutely perfect night, all that planning and organising comes down to one night, a night that is nerve wracking in the build up but this year I was full of confidence that we would, once again, have a success on our hands.

So we start with room set up and this year we were lucky enough (thankfully) to be able to get into New Dock Hall on Friday to start the massive task of putting on 515 chair covers and bows!  Once again this isn't possible without Sam, Karen and their fabulous team at Glamourpuss Weddings along with a little help from the Big Ball Central crew!

Kieron at Giant Events was also hard at work in the room setting up the fabulous Event Books which I have to say added the most unique element to the night, these books are Kieron's baby, designed and built by him they can be personalised perfectly to your event.  I loved the turning pages and the fact that the content changed running alongside the event.

Saturday was spent in a haze of balloons and ribbon for perfectionist Sam whilst the rest of us either curled said ribbon, sprinkled table diamonds, lit centrepieces and generally prettied the room whilst lighting, projection and sound engineers worked to make the room glow like the Winter Wonderland we wanted.

 I had my orders to be back in the room to brief everyone by 5.45, The Vegas Girls were in position feathers on and sequins glowing, the band was sound checked and the brilliant Ian Royce was all set and ready to go.

The doors were opened, drinks were poured and the the reception was filling up pretty quickly!  Flitting in and out of the rooms I did manage to say Hi to a few people although not nearly as many as I would've liked but then the nerves really started to kick in and I found a quiet corner in the main room to take a few breaths.  Joined by 'Roycey' we chatted and he really took my mind off things making me laugh and making me swoon by dropping in the fact he'd had an email from Gary Barlow the day before ... Imagine,  'The Captain' actually emailed him !!!

Ian is a genuinely lovely man who, without knowing me, agreed to spare his precious time to host the ball for nothing.  It was just a casual mention on twitter that had him doing his damnedest, despite a busy Britain's Got Talent Schedule, to be there for us.  I'm so so glad he did what a superb addition to the night he was and his generous donation to the auction saw it raise £4000 as well as another £6000 through our other lots. 

Mark Waddington joined us again this year to blow our minds with his Close up magic and he was joined by Marc Lavelle to help him along as the attendance was so big.  I know they were a huge hit with those they managed to see judging by the cheers and hollers from around the room!

This year I wanted to add a surprise element to the night with the addition of Singing waiters.  Provided by Dave Molloy at Events Line the girls certainly had everyone fooled and had the room up and on their feet during a break in the casino and auction.  I'm extremely grateful to Dave for helping us out and if you need to add a surprise element to your event the Singing Waiters are perfect

The Fabulous Vegas Girls were ever present and did a superb job in getting everyone to their casino tables on time, our table was appalling and lost all our cash within 2 spins however our highest rolling table did fabulously and bagged themselves the £500 cash prize. The Vegas Girls are always on duty and professional and I think will be a regular addition to our event from now on, I've seen some brilliant pictures of them with guests and am gutted I didn't take the opportunity to have my picture taken with them. Massive Thanks again to all the girls for their hard work.

And so the night continued with the raffle and Auction led perfectly by 'Roycey' he kept the whole room involved and encouraging lots of bids, we made more on our auction this year than we did at our first event back in 2010! I was left speechless at the amounts and I'd like to say Thank You to everyone who donated an auction lot to us.

During the night I do like to take a moment, stand back and look at what we managed to achieve and it is helped along by a select few.  As I do a little wander and try to talk to most tables every year the same people stop me and allow me that time, without them I wouldn't take the chance so Thanks to them.

It was dancing time with the fantastic Vibetown as our band for the night they sang their socks (and our shoes) off, for the rest of the night the dancefloor was jam packed, it was absolutely brilliant and I loved that they were even taking requests at one point due to heckling from the front.  

All too soon the DJ was calling time at the bar and the night was drawing to a close the night had gone unbelievably fast, 7 hours had gone in the blink of an eye and all that was left to do was count up to our total.

Alexander's Charity Ball 2014 was a resounding success we raised over £27,000 for The Lullaby Trust but none of it would be possible without the generosity of sponsors and prize donators.  The more successful the ball becomes the more we need the help of sponsors. Glamourpuss, Who Ate My Crayons and Giant Events donated their time, expertise and contacts for nothing which allowed the night to grow but we also couldn't put our ideas into practice without the help of our cash sponsors Stephen Crowther Associates, Coda Studios, Bapp Group, IT@Spectrum, Lancaster Property Services and of course New Dock Hall.

Thank You everyone involved in any way you are helping me to create an amazing legacy for my little star, I hope that we are able to continue making Alexander's Charity Ball a success with your help. It's not easy putting myself out there time and again, telling Alexander's story over and over but I know that it is more than worth it for the good it will do and the people it will help through The Lullaby Trust.

Tell me about your night, what you enjoyed, how you felt it went and share your pictures with us over on Facebook

See You Next Year !!!!!

This post has been a long time in writing, it's one thing to share my story but another one completely to put into words the heartbreak of another. 

On Saturday 2nd February Jennie Edspire and her family's lives were devastated when little Matilda Mae never woke from her sleep.  A week away from Alexander's 6th anniversary it was a heartbreaking reminder of that time for us.

The very close world of Mummy Bloggers was rocked to the core as they found out this devastating news and I was contacted by a few who know me and my story to ask me to reach out to Jennie, I was more than happy to do so.  I'm not a blogger but I follow a few, I love reading other people's hints and tips, recipes, life stories and Jennie's story and words since this tragedy happened have been so heartbreakingly close to my experience I wanted to share her blog link so you can see her journey.  

Jennie hasn't held back in the telling of Matilda Mae's story but she writes with such honesty and emotion you have to admire her strength and courage.  Many would hide away from the world, shut themselves off to grieve privately but in telling her nightmare I feel Jennie has started creating her legacy for Matilda Mae.  Jennie is a doer, she reminds me of me!  Using the internet to it's full resource to keep the memory of her precious daughter alive she is blogging making people aware that Sudden Infant Death Syndrome is a very real nightmare.  On launch day for the Lullaby Trust there was an amazing outpouring of support from her blogging community who all linked up to get the message out there and I know that she is also fundraising for them by holding A Mile In Memory of Matilda Mae.

She is sharing her story, making it public and seeking help, there are so many people reaching out to her I hope she knows she is never far from many's thoughts. http://www.edspire.co.uk/ 

Jennie has been nominated in the BritMums Brilliance in Blogging Awards (BiBs) and I'd like to help her get the recognition she deserves for wearing her heart on her sleeve.  This is a bittersweet nomination for Jennie and one she maybe feels she doesn't deserve or wouldn't have happened were it not for the loss of her daughter.  I wish with all my heart another family hadn't been affected by SIDS and I hope Jennie takes strength from the nomination, Matilda is helping her share this very special and emotional journey of grief.  Please take a minute to vote for Edspire 
http://www.edspire.co.uk/year_2013/04/23/a-cheeky-request/


  It's for families like Jennie's and babies like Matilda Mae and Alexander that I fundraise, I want to stop Sudden Infant Death Syndrome in it's tracks, to stop families hurting like we do, to keep babies where they belong...in their mothers arms! 

So as one more baby leaves this world in turmoil I was reminded of a Poem written for and read at the Family Carol Service held in York at Christmas by FSID.  From one heartbroken Mummy to another Jennie Thank You for telling people how it feels to be us x

Precious Memories - Valerie Robinson 

You were with us for a short time only.
Such a very short time.
Too short for us to know you well:
Part of our lives forever, we thought,
Not knowing that yours would be so short.


We will never know the person you would become,
You will never know life's joys and fears,
But you understand that you are loved:
The world and life you have barely seen,
Which should have been yours-Should have been.


Did you know our anguish when you were gone?
Part of us, yet, no longer here.
We will never understand the reason for our loss:
Life's gift can be lost through accident or disease,
But who understands when it's neither of these.


Does God need some children in Heaven
To balance the long-lived souls.
Why He wanted you with Him, he alone only knows:
Memories of our happiness are still so deep,
All too soon you went to sleep.


Your life to us was precious,
We valued every hour.
The memories of you will never be lost:
With each passing year we let our love grow,
Why you are not with us, we still don't know.


Valerie Robinson 

So we've dotted the i's crossed the t's and the proud moment has arrived. 
I've written the cheque payable to The Foundation for the Study of Infant Deaths for £16029 !!!

This is what makes all that planning and organising worthwhile, knowing that your money is going to help in so many ways.

FSID are still looking at how the money will be spent but it will be staying within Yorkshire and as soon as we have a final breakdown of who it;s helping I will inform you all.

I'm so proud of what we can achieve and year on year as the ball gets bigger I know we can keep hitting bigger and better targets.  I'm grateful for any money raised and I try not to set myself up for a fall but you did me proud this year and I was and still am overwhelmed at that total.

In the 6 years since Alexander died we have held a few fundraisers, walked a few miles, ran many more (not me I hasten to add) and still my son's memory continues to motivate people to keep giving and to keep challenging themselves.

I want to find out exactly how fabulous you all are and I shall definitely be back with a complete total on how much we've raised over 6 years so watch this space 

So once again a Massive Thank You from me and here's to 2014 !!!

This is a guest post from Helen at Photography for Little People about who she is and why she supports Alexander's Charity Ball 

When I first heard about Alexander's Charity and the tragedy that had
 struck Nicola and her family I felt a tremendous wave of sadness and
 wondered how you could ever continue on lives path.  I must admit I
 came home that night, at the time my own son was 17months old and I held him so tight thinking if that had of been me!
 
 Anyway as I recently started my own business I was looking to work
 with a charity that would be part of me and Photography for Little
 People Sheffield.  I felt after all these years of dreaming of my own business that part of it was also to help raise awareness and monies for a worthwhile cause.  I had looked at lots of charities but none
 that struck a cord with me, until of course I met Nicola.
 
 I spent many a night thinking and reading Nicola's story, which then prompted me to research FSID even more.  I arranged a coffee with Nicola and I knew within minutes that Alexander's Charity was the
 one for me.  Something inside knew that I had to do all I could, however small to help raise awareness and do what I could to show that there are more families than we know who are suffering in the way Nicola and her family have and still do.  And without the families such as Nicola and the charity, all of those other families in need would have no where to turn to.  Realistically, this is Alex's charity and one Nicola has poured her heart and soul into.  I wanted Nicola to know she could trust me in promoting the charity in a positive way, so I really was on tenderhooks until Nicola expressed her delights in having PLP be part of something so personal.  However all in all my small contribution makes me feel part of something special and unique.
 
 So what have I been doing?  Well so far I have just had all my artwork re done to include Alexander's Charity logo and links to the charity on the Sheffield PCT trust.  I am currently working on getting the link on my business page and on my next print run of leaflets and posters, the logo will be proudly part of my work.  On
 top of that I am actively seeking a celebrity to agree to have an impression of their hand, along with a signed photo to be auctioned on the night of the Ball! Both me and Nicola are hoping that if we
 get the celebrity on board they may even attend.....so watch this space!!!!!  

 On a personal note and although I never met Alex, I am sure he would be so proud of his mummy who is a true inspiration.  And because of Nicola I feel that I can spread the awareness of Alex but in a truly
 positive way and as mummy it has made me more thankful for my very own piece of perfection!

Helen is the busiest person ever but has still taken the time out to include ACB as part of her work, we are still in the early stages of this collaboration so we are both working on ideas to make this work for us both.  Please take a look at PLP's main website they have some lovely shots and impressions and do a great amount of work for charity _ Helen is also on Facebook so please go over and give her a like by clicking here 

So it's done I have officially completed my training and signed up to be an FSID Befriender.

Travelling to York on Saturday I was still feeling apprehensive about whether it was the right thing to do and about I would meet.  I haven't 'met' others who have suffered a loss the same as me face to face and although I've shared our story on the FSID website and in their 40 years book I was anxious about sharing it with a complete stranger.

I hate entering a room of strangers on my own, it's a huge insecurity of mine and whilst I appear confident and outgoing I am quite shy and uncertain in situations like this however, I had no need to worry.  I suppose as a befriender you can't be too shy or reserved and so as we all arrived we got chatting about the journey, parking etc you know the mundane chatty things strangers talk about.

It turns out there was a mix of us in the group with a few being experienced befrienders there for catch up training and the rest of us there to work on the skills required to be a befriender.  It was also nice to meet members of the FSID team as well, Hafsa and Jean who were guiding us on the day and Gill Ryder who is the Regional Development Officer for FSID in the Yorkshire (and more) region.

I don't want to go into the ins and outs of the day but we started the day in pairs each telling the other our story with the aim being that we would then introduce our partner to the group.  I was honoured to hear Mary's story about her grandson Edward and I think all of us were surprised at how emotional we all got, we shared parts of our story that we wouldn't normally share with a stranger and we came to the conclusion that as they'd been through a similar tragedy, subconsciously, we weren't afraid of upsetting or shocking that person as they could empathise with our situation.

The whole aim of befriending is to get the caller to open up and talk about the things they feel they can't with anyone else, knowing that the befriender can hear the bad parts of the story without glossing over it or telling you to pull yourself together.  No one else knows the pain of losing a child suddenly and unexpectedly like another.  They ring the helpline because they want to talk and I have to give them the space to do that, letting them know I am willing to listen to everything they have to say without offering the usual platitudes.  You know the usual 'It'll get easier over time' or 'It's normal to feel this way but time is great healer' the things you say when you don't want to hear the bad bits and unconsciously cut the other person off. 

I came away on Saturday with a confidence that I could do this and whilst it's not easy to hear someone's very sad story they need to tell it to someone so why shouldn't it be me!  I was privileged to meet all those brilliant and brave Mums, Grandma's, Aunties and Granddad's who have all felt as I did and understood this ache that I have on a daily basis.  They shared their story with me and I with them and they got it every single one them and I thank them for that. 

Befriending isn't a massive commitment so I may receive contact only a handful of times in a year but once that contact is made it could be a longer term commitment involving a phonecall every couple of weeks or so or maybe even an email.  Also once a year attending one of the family fun days run by FSID (which are free anyway) and taking an hour or two out of my day to be available to chat if I'm needed.  Considering Alexander's Ball are funding the Yorkshire regions fun day for 2013 we shall definitely be there!

Thank You to Jean and Hafsa who made the day as comfortable as possible, who answered questions and sat patiently whilst we shared our stories and often went off the track sometimes! 
 
Thank you